There have been so many things we've come to learn as moms during this quarantine or lock down period. How to make a homemade lasagna while we try to help our kids learn math all while trying to make that 3:30 p.m. Zoom call. We've also learned that after dinner when the kids are doing the whole bath thing followed by stories and we can finally make it to the couch for an hour for a glass of wine and television, that's exactly when the next day's to-do list makes its appearance in our brain.
Here's the big question for a lot of moms out there though — does having a firm schedule with the kids work better or do some families benefit from a more go-with-the-flow approach? It really does depend on your children and how they are able to live and behave with a routine and perhaps more importantly, how they do when that routine isn't in place.
Let's dig right into which works best for moms: firm schedules or go-with-the-flow?
Routines help with harder times, like school work and bed time
There are some chunks of time through out a mother's day where you just have to admit that when you're child is on a schedule, it's just easier! For a lot of us moms out there, those times are when we need our kids to be doing school work and when we are trying to put them down for bed. Education.com makes an excellent point when they said that a lot of ''younger children do not yet fully understand the concept of time'', so they need a parent to help them make their way from one activity or chunk of time to another.
They also make note that setting up a routine around important tasks, such as having to do school work or getting ready for bed, it makes it so there is very little room for argument or temper tantrums. They already know what to expect and more importantly, what's expected of them, so it can severely cut down on the stress of the situation for both parties involved.
Some kids learn better with more freedom
On the other side of things though, aren't there just some children who do a bit better with a more go-with-the-flow approach to things? After all, even when it comes to such crucial things like learning how to do their school work or even for the older kids with things like figuring out how to unload the dishwasher properly, doesn't there need to be some opportunities to fail as well?
Patch.com spoke to an expert who examined the fact that ''by depriving children of opportunities to play on their own, away from direct adult supervision and control, we are depriving them of opportunities to learn how to take control of their own lives''. Which, it's quite an important thing to learn the trial and error of everyday things. Plus, it can work to ''diminish their joy'' as well as prevent them from ''discovering and exploring the endeavors they would most love''.
Firm schedules offer stability & learning to take initiative
There's also something to be said about wanting your child to grow up to learn to be independent and self-reliant. As moms, we all want our kids to be strong and responsible young people, right? Oxford Learning Centre offers up some sound advice when they state that routines or firmer schedules can actually allow a child to learn to take initiative and gain independence because that sense of stability can actually work to make them more confident.
We have to admit that there aren't a lot of children out there who completely fall in love with big surprises to their everyday routines — unless that includes a trip to Disneyland, so if we can help them to become confident as people and really trust themselves? It makes a lot of sense to try and stick to a firmer schedule because most of the time it only helps things in the long run to remind our children that they're safe and cared for.
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July 09, 2020 at 09:40PM
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Scheduling Or Go-With-The-Flow For Kids, Which Is Better? - Moms
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